Cruelty of the Gods
by nicochii
Summary: When all hope is lost, we often seek solace in those who hold our heart in their hands.


He triggered the oracle drive again, letting the sequence repeat while he watched with eyes glazed over, his body hunched over the table with fatigue as his mind fought sleep with longing.

"Light.. I'll find a way to save you."

The champion smirked from the shadows, reveling in the irony that she'd been watching him just as much as he'd been watching her. With newfound confidence, she stepped forwards, the moonlight descending through the window shining a brilliant alabaster off her armor.

"Are you a peeping Tom now? Tch, I thought I'd trained you better than that."

Jade eyes widened in shock, fear gripping the former l'Cie before curiosity overtook him, whipping his head over his shoulder as his body stiffened with alertness. His heart nearly stopped when the woman approached him, memories of her hardened face replaced by the playful smirk dancing on her lips now, eyebrows raised at him while she rested a hand on her waist.

"And how much exactly have you seen?"

"Lightning.."

The Director pushed up from his seat, capturing his former mentor in an enveloping hug, his body trembling with disbelief.

"You're here.. You're _alive!"_

Lightning stood rigidly, slightly surprised by the sudden contact. She thought she'd be able to handle it; after all, she'd thought nothing of the frequent hand holding with him as a child. But here, with him holding her so close, taller, broader, stronger; her voice caught in her throat, unable to move as he trembled against her, unaffected by the armor.

"Hope.. Of course I'm alive. I couldn't just.. Leave you,"

Her face fell as he released her, keeping his hands on her arms, fearing she'd disappear again. His eyes sought hers, but she refused to meet them, guilt overtaking her.

"After we saved Cocoon; we were holding hands, do you remember? You and I, we were crystallized next to each other."

She closed her eyes at the memory, her heart stinging at the realization of how abandoned this man as a boy must have felt.

"Yes, I remember, Hope."

She could almost feel his face light up as his hands excitedly shifted against her biceps, sliding the gloves about the taut muscles.

"So it really did happen! Serah was the only one who believed me; I wasn't even sure myself, but here you are! But, Light.. Where did you go?" She clenched her eyes tighter, the sadness in his voice too much to bear. "Why did you leave us? You left me—"

"Hope!"

Lightning stepped back, breaking their connection as she dropped her eyes to his feet. The man slowly lowered his arms to his sides, hands unclenched as he waited for an explanation. The former sergeant choked on her words.

"The oracle drive. How much have you seen?"

The Director turned back towards the ancient technology, stopping the recording and choosing a different one. The one where Cocoon would fall.

"I've seen you succeed. I've seen you fail. I've seen you taken away from us." She turned to the side again as he took a step towards her, gesturing for her attention. "But what I haven't figured out is _why? _Where did you go, and why weren't any of the other l'Cie summoned? Why did you have to be alone?"

The pitch in his voice startled her, effectively bringing deep azure to meet his fiery mint green.

"Hope, Etro—"

"She summoned you, didn't she? But why were none of us brought with you? I could have helped you! We could have—!"

"Hope!"

Her voice was stern, commanding; much like those ten years ago as the man before her yielded just like back then, teeth gritted, frustrated. Her body was shaking, mind reeling as she tried to separate her rage from grief, the emotions hitting her harder in this place where time still flowed. The silence settled in heavily around them, the two companions quiet as they waited for one another. She knew he deserved answers. He deserved better than this.

"Hope, I,"

Lightning struggled to find the words, her thoughts tangled when she looked up at him, meeting his indignant gaze. A noiseless breath escaped her as she balled her fists, at her sides, looking down once more. She moved nearer to him, standing next to his side and facing the oracle drive.

"After we saved Cocoon,.. We ruined everything; we screwed up, Hope. We thought that by opposing our focus, we were fighting our fates, that we could overturn the deities because we had free will. But did we really?"

The warrior turned her eyes upon the projection in the sky, watching as Caius succeeded in yet another timeline to destroy Cocoon. Her eyes fell somber.

"We never fulfilled our focus, Hope."

"But we were crystallized. Serah was crystallized."

His voice was soft next to her ear, the deeper tone sending shivers down her spine as sapphire eyes fluttered shut, teeth gritted.

"That was the work of Etro. We were supposed to die, Hope. Along with the others. Fang and Vanille were supposed to become Ragnarok and kill us."

She dared to steal a glance of his reaction. His eyes were a hard emerald, watching her intently with a twitch at the corner of his lips but refrained from speaking. She dropped her gaze to his tie.

"This battle, in Valhalla; this is not our war. And I don't think this is a battle we can win. Hope, I,"

She paused, unable to force her thoughts into words. How could she tell him, this man who'd idolized her as a teenager, who'd fallen in love with the idea of an unstoppable warrior? She couldn't live up to those expectations, not anymore. When she was a soldier, she'd been trained for the circumstances, she knew how to deal with them.

But a battle of the gods? She was no deity.

"Light."

The warrior jumped at the touch, his fingers surprisingly warm against her cheek. Her eyes flickered between his chartreuse, unable to grasp how he was so calm about all this. She cut him off before he could speak, gripping at his wrist.

"No, Hope. You don't understand. Etro is dying, and she expects _me _to take her place. But I can't, not this time. I'm too—I'm not a _god._ Hope; I just can't. I—"

The silk of the wrap on his wrist was caught between her fingers, her words swallowed as he sealed the gap between them, keeping his body apart from hers. The last thing he needed was to corner her, but typical of Lightning, she was being too stubborn to ask for help. Their moment was brief, chaste as he pulled away, eyes lidded while he sought out the fiery spirit that was dwindling somewhere within her.

"H-Hope."

His heart skipped a beat, not at the way she said his name, or the way her hands gripped the front of his uniform, and not how she pulled his head down forcefully, pressing their bodies together for something more than a kiss. No, it was the way she looked at him.

_Without hope._

His hands dug into the small of her back as he tasted her, tears welling in his eyes as he tried desperately to meld her body with his. Armor and uniform fell to the side, the two shirking their duties as they stumbled in the dark towards a tent, their worries and troubles tossed aside in the heat of the moment.

They were in love; that much was clear by the way they clung to each other, racing towards a finish while desperately trying to make it last forever. Because they knew; they both knew this was no fairy tale, so when she cried into the night air without restraint, he held her close and whispered sweet nothings into her ear and stroked her hair until she fell into a restless slumber.

The gods were truly cruel.


End file.
